Dr. Ardant has a PhD in Theoretical Nukology from Cannedbridge University, and an honourary PhD in Applied Nukology from MalTech. He is the director of the National Association for Supernuking TechnologY (NASTY), and recently hosted a world conference on new nuke technologies of the future - NukeDex '99. His latest pride and joy is getting First Vote and First Post on a Slashdot poll!

Prof. Qing, Q.C., is a post doctorate fellow at the Chernobyl Institute for Studies in Radiation. She also is the president of the Data Destruction Club of Canada. From her secret laboratory situated in the heart of downtown Toronto, she practices and perfects her nuking techniques. She won the 1994 Mobel Peace Prize for her dissertation and research into "Using Nukes to Solve World Problems". She was also recently elected "Ruler of the World" by the /. webpoll! (pipe dreams, pipe dreams...)

decordas is a member of the Association of Professional Microwavers Users. When he's not at the microwave toasting a CD, he can be found meditating in a forest in Kamloops B.C., writing high-order homogenous non-linear differential equations for optimum CD nuking times.

Zuckuss is a rogue researcher in the field of data destruction. He holds the record for being the youngest person to ever receive their RCNE (Radiology Certified Nuking Engineer). He spent 3 years in large scale industrial toasting but quickly tired of the field and took a 18 month hiatus to travel the world and learn the secrets of ancient toasters of Peru, the cult of toast in Nepal, as well as search for the ultimate toast which, according to arcane legends, the pursuit of it caused Atlantis to sink. He has currently returned to Toronto and practicing his rogue toasts in a basement laboratory to escape the regulations brought into effect by the NANA (North American Nuking Agreement).